Laughter is the best medicine...

 This post might be short and sweet this week because my poor little Zachary cried and cried all evening and his momma is very tired...  He cried during his bottle (which has become a sort of norm...) and then he cried before bed... It never used to be this way.. I mean, Zachary was always my picky eater and he has always been my most fussy baby but it has regressed this week.  I have such a hard time feeding him now, especially when I'm alone and I have two other babies to feed.  He'll drink his first few ounces no problem and then it's like something hit him hard and he'll start bawling.  I called the paediatrician who told me not to force him if he doesn't want to eat which is what I did the next day and it seemed to work.  It worked for about a day and a half... I really thought I had it solved but now he won't even drink half his bottle before the screeching begins.  I mean, I won't let my child only drink 3oz per feed!  He'll eat better if we walk around with him, but we can't do that forever!  Today I bought an exercise ball and after he started crying after 2oz, I sat on the ball and fed him on that and he finished 7oz!!  We had the Family Channel on and he was watching that while we were rocking on the ball... I don't know, maybe he just needs distraction but I really don't want to be feeding my baby rocking on an exercise ball four times a day, especially if I have two other babies to feed so I really hope to figure out what's wrong with him... On top of his aversion to his bottle, he now has an aversion to going to sleep at night... for the past two nights, Gabe and I have spent about an hour trying to calm him down enough to go to sleep...  we've done the CIO (cry it out), we've rocked, we've sang, we've bounced, and he'll just cry and cry... First he'll cry because he doesn't want to sleep, then he'll cry because he's angry that we won't pick him up and lastly he'll cry because he's tired which is when the NOTHING works to calm him...  He was, again, always the hardest one to put to bed, but nothing like this...  It's just tiring and sad because I just don't know what to do and it makes me feel so defeated...  We are going to see the high-risk doctor on Tuesday with the boys so I'm hoping he can give me some insight as to what's up with him.  Maybe he's just a needy baby??  I mean, don't get me wrong, I love giving my boys some cuddles, but at this point, he needs more than cuddles to soothe him and it's getting harder and harder on both he and I...

Here he is cuddling on his momma today... he didn't want to nap in his crib so I cuddled :)

Jacob and Samuel also decided this week that they would be difficult eaters... like I need that! Ha!  They drink their first 3/4 of their bottle no problem and then decide that it's much more fun to play with the nipple with their tongue than it is to drink!  Then they look at me and smile... it's hard to be upset with them when they do that!!  It's like they've discovered a new game that makes them laugh and then they know it makes us laugh so they don't eat, they just play!  I can't wait to start solids... that should be fun!! haha...  

All these feeding difficulties make me realize how much hired help would be beneficial!!!  When I was pregnant, I got many promises of help from friends who soon realized that they have their own lives to live and can't stop that life on my account.  Life gets busy without you realizing it and good intentions often remain just that.  I, in no way shape or form, resent any of them for this.  I just wish I could win the lottery to be able to afford to hire help full time!  My mother, bless her heart, helps me as much as she can, but she also has her own life to live and can't be here all the time.  These are my children and most days I can handle it on my own but some days I have to call my husband to come home early because I just can't take it anymore and break down in tears the moment he walks in the door.  I've heard my friends say to other people that I "make it look easy" well trust me, that's all it is, and illusion because as much as I've got it under control most of the time, I would never call what I do easy but it is, despite all my bitchiness, the best job I've ever been "given".  One year ago today I nervously walked into the fertility clinic to get my first IUI treatment hoping this would finally give us the child we so desperately wanted... it wasn't a great romantic "you were conceived under a moonlight sky in Paris" sort of story... more like "under a big hospital light with daddy holding my hand and another woman in my vagina" sort of story but it will still be one of the greatest days of my life because my boys were created that day and I will forever cherish every non romantic part of it!

Regardless of all the difficulties this life brings, there are wonderful moments as well... Samuel has started to laugh (see video below) and the other two boys aren't far behind... 

Aside from Zachary's struggles with his feedings and his nighttime routine, he loves to dance and play on his playmat.  He still sounds like a cat when he's happy and it's the cutest and funniest sound you've ever heard.  Jacob has also started laughing, but is not quite full forced yet.  He is such a happy funny kid!  They are all grasping at objects, bringing the toys that hang above them on the playmats to their faces.  They're trying to touch their faces in the mirror (even though I learned today from watching a documentary that they won't know it's their own faces until they're like 2 so to them, they're playing with another baby...).  They are looking at each other more and more and I sometimes find them looking to see where the other ones are.  Samuel and Jacob love to stand on their toes.  Zachary has no muscle tone yet so he loves to sit in a sort of W on us.  I'm working on getting him to stand tall.  We are also going to see the physical therapist and the occupational therapist on Tuesday so they'll give me an idea as to where the boys are at and what I need to do to continue their progress.  Another reason why I bought the exercise ball is because I saw that it can be a good tool to help their physical development so it'll be fun to play with them on the ball.  They are getting better and better at sitting (assisted of course) and they are starting to like it more and more.  I'm looking forward to the day when I can put all three of them in their Bumbos in a circle and they can all chit chat.  

Well this turned into a longer post than I meant it to be but my eyes are closing as I'm writing so I'll just put up the pictures (which is what you really come to see anyway...) and say good night...

Auntie Sarah lent us a bunch of clothes so we had to put them on right away!  Samuel looking dapper :)

Zachary looking every bit like the little man he is...

Jacob's Daddy's #1 little man alright!  

Mommy trying to make tummy time more fun with a big mirror :)

Samuel rocking his new shades!  He was the only one in a good enough mood for me to try them on! 

Mel must have held Sam for about an hour at the birthday party! 

Zachary watching the TV

Samuel...with his tongue....always out!! 

Jacob in his new PJs due to his having spit up all over the last one...or two...or three... my little man likes spitting up! 

This pic clearly shows the progression of all my boys.  Jacob is a tummy time pro, Samuel is a semi-pro and Zachary... well he's still an amateur but we're working on it... Clearly, he hates me at the moment this picture was taken and Jacob is looking at him as if to say "What's your problem?!?"

Jacob trying to look at the TV through the mirror (he's obsessed... we've already had to wean him off TV!!)

Jacob prefers to suck on his fingers rather than his thumb... he also makes himself gag which in turn makes him... you guessed it: SPIT UP! haha... I just think he likes new outfits!  

Starting to master the Bumbo... Samuel is doing much better than Jacob.  Zachary is as good as Samuel but he was sleeping at the time and we only currently have two Bumbos. 

Zachary is doing much better after a few days of practice

Leaning to the side but liking it more and more

Just a super cute pic! 

So we got snow this week.... only in the Maritimes my friends... 

Gabe not looking to pleased about having to clean the cars of snow... again!  haha

The boys in their super cute plaid shirts (again, thanks Auntie Sarah!!)

We got to take part of a donation to the Moncton Hospital NICU by the Moncton Multiple Association of which I'm a proud member!.  The chair I'm sitting on is going to be amazing to all the moms in there.  The chairs they currently have don't hold a candle to this one.  When you're trying to give your baby  (or babies)  skin to skin time (which is proven to be beneficial to the growth and development of sick/premature babies), you want to be as comfortable as possible and having been able to sit in this new donated chair , I can tell you that the moms will be fighting over this one!!   These are the sort of things you're contributing to when you go to the Moncton Multiple Sale and such things so on behalf of all the moms who are going to get to enjoy this chair during a difficult time in their lives, I say THANK YOU!! 

It was one of my best friend's baby shower today.  My in-laws came to help out Gabe and I got to spend a wonderful two hours with friends I don't get to see often enough!!  You can see the beautiful mother to be smiling in the background! 

All the kids at the birthday party!  We finally got to meet the rest of the crew!!

Good night my friends... thanks for your support and remember to live, laugh and love.... xox