These two pictures pretty much sum up our life at the moment... If we're not fighting with them to go to bed, we're wrestling baby alligators to get them dressed, changed or undressed...
I'm not usually a huge fan of people telling me what to do or how to run my life because well... that's just who I am. I'm normally even a lesser fan of other people telling me how to raise my children or how to make a situation better. When my friend Julie commented on last week's post about bedtime and how I should drop by to see her, I rolled my eyes a little and said to myself "No one know my life... putting triplets to bed is not something anyone in my life has ever had to do" but I told myself that I need to put my pride aside and maybe perhaps she'd have some insight because you all know that what we HAD been doing wasn't working out that well... We had been going at it for a month and there was no improvement and sitting on our butts in the hallway was really starting to get to us. So Monday morning, I put my big girl panties on and I go seek the advice of another mom. Now, I'm not saying I had never done this before, my friend Alicia has always been a great resource for me and so are my other friends but for this, we were all at the WTFK stage and good luck to you is all we got as advice lol. I knock on Julie's door fully expecting to hear all sorts of things I had already heard but Julie is such a nice person with the best of intentions at all time so I sat down in her guidance counselor student chair and waited. What she said to me next was something that should have occurred to me but hadn't. I won't go into her personal details but she convinced me that her situation was pretty dire as well. She got advice from a professional after a while and she was told that, like anything to do with toddlers, positive reinforcement and lots of love was the way to go. She told me to tell them that we would go hug and kiss the babies that were laying down then walking away. No sitting in the room, no sitting outside of the room, just going to a point where they can't see you and then going in every thirty seconds to start with. Those who are not in their beds, you put them right back without a word and immediately go reward those who are. Alright! Something we haven't tried yet! We already truly believe in the power of positive reinforcement with their behaviour and isn't them getting out of bed just another behaviour?
I talked to Gab when I came home and we agreed that it was worth a try. So the first night we decided to give a small go, I wasn't going to be home so it was up to Gab to try. He wasn't feeling over confident but tried anyway. It took him about an hour to get them all down and sleeping. Night #2, I was the one who was in charge and I decided to go full tilt with the new method. I figured that just like anything, as long as consistency is followed, it should work. It took me about 50 minutes. The first little bit was really hard because Jacob went into full toddler meltdown stomp by feet on the ground and scream like a banshee mode every time I left the room. He wanted Papa and that was that. I finally calmed him down when I told him that Papa had gone to Walmart and he would come to give him a big kiss when he came back... Phew! I know the method clearly stated NOT to talk to them if they got out of bed but this worked so I went with it. Night #3, Gab was back at it. This time it was mostly Sam giving him a hard time... and so it went... One night while Gab was out getting something on my night, I got them down and quiet in 15 minutes!!! Granted, we let them play outside all evening and we've been pushing their bedtime about 30 minutes later so that might have something to do with it but who knows. Last night we decided to do it together to see if they asking for the other parent would tone them down but nope... Sam thought it was a fun joke to wait until we left, go to the door and run to his bed when he saw us coming. He played that game way too long... last night was not a good night but tonight they were down within 30 minutes. It's certainly not paradise but we are slowly getting there with consistency. At least we are not sitting in the hallway! Last night, I even cleaned the whole bathroom between hugs and kisses! We are slowly getting there but it's still rough... Nap time has finally become good again as we separate them but we can't separate them at night... We need them to know that they need to sleep in their beds.
So yeah... that's our lives... bedtime and trying to find the energy after work, entertaining toddlers, wrestling them in and out of their various outfits and diapers to the point where I think I might break their bones if I push harder due to the insane amount of leg power they've developed in their tiny little bodies (I won't don't worry!!)
So Gab always leaves me blog notes and he's becoming quite the blogger himself... if only he wasn't so shy! I decided that I would post HIS version of the week, how bedtime is going through HIS eyes... There are always things I forget to write about... here goes Gab's take:
Tueaday morning boys slept umtil 530 and Sam until 615. I caught Jacob on the Webcam sneaking in to Zachary bed so I rushed over on hopes to get him before he woke Zach up. No luck ...they were both awake. Sam slept another 45 minutes
The how's tried out their new bikes Tuesday night and LOVED THEM! Only problem was they didn't want to stop to go to bed
Tuesday 15 minutes of trying to get them to bed constantly running around and out of the room. I mean a constant up and running. Putting down. Two take off. Get another one down the one that was down takes off...this went on for 15 minutes straight. Then I tried a positive reinforcement technique suggested by a friend which involves a kiss and hug initiative for the toddler who is in bed after a certain time interval to motivate them to stay in bed. I honestly think it's a great method. ...however....it's not so good with 3 kids in one room. I tried this for over 45 minutes and the problem is you have 2 on board going with this system but none against it. Jacob for example....after about ten minutes Sam decides to also revolt even though hugs and kisses was working for him he now falls to the dark side. So now number only have one buying in to this method....and he eventually gives up and I'm back to square one. And his happens multiple times over the next 45 minutes where I get one or to on board then it all falls off. By this time I've been at it for over and hour before they finally sort of lay down. But then they go back in the routine of asking for there blanket over and over again. Even at one point Zachary told me he wanted me to leave...but the other two want me to stay. It's always that way. Always none you can't please. And after an hour and 15 minutes Jacob starts crying again. I can't keep doing this. It's not possible to sleep train 3 babies in the same room in toddler bed.ideal would be to seperate them and we do not have the space to seperate them. Everytime two are down and calm you go tend to the other one you turn around and the other two are playing on fighting or crying or doing anything but laying down and relaxing the way they were. Now an hour and 25 minutes in Sam decided he is going to sing itsy bitsy spider. ....and the other two don't like it. Shushing him and telling him no. He do you stop a kid from singing...seriously. I'm so lost. We were not the parents who ran to their kids for every little peep or little request but now with toddler beds if we aren't at their beck and call they quickly retaliate with violence on a sibling. Mostly Jacob retaliated but even tonight when I was doing something for Jacob Sam got really mad at Zachary and pushed him really hard. I didn't see it happen all I know is Zachary got hurt pretty bad because it was his I'm hurt cry and Sam admitted right away to pushing Zachary. an hour and a half into it they are all finally down and quiet for about 2 or 3 minutes....not asleep....but down
Wednesday night 2 of positive reinforcement for bed time. Mommy put the kids to bed and they were asleep with I an hour. She was actually able to leave the doorway and do some stuff in between. Might be making progress. Thursday morning....small victory?? The boys stayed in bed until almost 6AM . We went in shortly before 6 to give them high and kisses for being good boys and staying in bed all night. Hopefully this will click with them since we are entering week 5 of big boy beds.
Thursday bed time. Mommy went to a paint and drink event so daddy was with the boys and pépère. We put them to bed....we'll I the bedroom i guess, then pépère left. It took about 5 minutes of putting them in bed over and over...then they were good except Jacob. So I left them room and told them I would be back for hugs and kisses. This worked great except for Jacob. Who cried for 20 minutes. Probably my fault because I only talked to the ones who were in bed and gave them a hug and kiss. After 20 minutes I did pick up Jacob. Hugged him and kissed him put him to bed and tucked him in with a little reassurance and he was almost 100%. I guess not everyone responds the same way. The other 2 I put in bed a couple times and they got the message. Not Jacob. He needed an extra caring touch. So about 40 minutes in they were almost good for the night except Sam got out of bed for random things almost resetting things. With in an hour of bed time they were good. Still not sure if we are making progress since the crying seems to be more harsh....but I didn't have to sit I the hall for an hour. I was between in the kicking room periodicly going in to reward with a kiss and a hug . I guess we'll have to see if we make progress.
Sam is VERY possessive. Mine mine mine and he gets SUPER angry even with things that were Cleary not his. Mine is his way of saying I want that also and he goes crazy when we tell him no. We'll have to find a way to curb that. I know we should tell him not and not let him have that. I get that....but it results I a huge crying tantrum. There has to be another way for us to cope with it. Thursday we played outside in the backyard and also with the boys downstairs. Our boys had a blast with their bikes and playing on the slide. Bedtime night 3 of new technique....we did tire them out and put them to bed a bit later but mommy got them to bed and sleep really fast. 20 minutes. Then one last hug and kiss session and they were asleep within 30 minutes. Hopefully this is a new routine for us and goes strong.
Saturday 6AM wake up time (woop woop). Not bad. Spent the day at the zoo. Naps went OK. Played all afternoon and evening in the back yard with the bikes. Bed time we didn't break any records but we did ok. 30 minutes to settle but after that they stayed In bed. I was wrong. Another 30 minutes later (an hour total after bed time) and they are still up. Sam has been getting out of bed and he even mad Zachary cry and he basically said Sam consequence ( time out) 1.5 hours total to get them down and they slept all night....u til Sam fell out of bed at 520 a.m.
Tonight... 30 ish minutes... not too bad...
Ok! Here is the week in pictures :
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| Me trying to get Zachary to do a duck face for a lip contest... lol |
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| Paint and Wine night!!!! |
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| The beginning |
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| The end... I think I did good! |
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| The boys are loving their new freedom in the backyard and so AM I! |
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| Jacob is waiting to give Zachary a hand up |
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| Zoo time! |
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| Sam's pretend angry face... look at that smile peaking through! |
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| Got outside in Kelly's newly fenced in backyard... it was great! |
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| Hello Kelly P and Kelly H! |
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| Hi Jacob! |
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| Sam taking a selfie |
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| And another |
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| Had an event at my niece's school today! Long afternoon but worth it :) |
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| The boys went to spend time at Mémére and Pépére's for Pépére's birthday |
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| I missed this afternoon with my boys... As much as I love my Younique business, it makes me sad that I miss these moments |
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| Look at how silly and happy Zachary looks! |
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| They love their strollers! |
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| Triplet baby girls for my triplet boys |
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| Look at his leg... lol |
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| Who was there first? |
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| Well that looks like fun! |
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| Gab got the boys balance bikes for the backyard! |
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| Jacob prefers to "fix" his than ride it |
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| Zachary would rather Pépére push him around |
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| He's getting the hang of it!! |
That's all folks! Have a good one!
