Tripletville Adventures : What's truly important?

I hurt someone I care about last week with words that meant no offense but to her were nonetheless hurtful. This person has been going through hell with family illnesses and fearing the uncertainty of things that are out of her control. She has been very fragile and I should have been more sensitive to her situation. This has been weighing on my mind as she saw me as someone she could rely on and now I'm not even sure that our budding friendship will ever be what it was. This is never something I thought I would ever have to deal with again because I see it on a daily basis in my classes. I see how mean some people can be and how fragile state of minds can affect how a simple joking comment can be made to seem so insensitive. I don't consider myself a mean person but I know that I can sometimes be sarcastic and maybe I need to take a step back and consider who my sarcasm is directed towards. If you are reading this, please know that I am deeply sorry.

In a world full of hate and judgement, it's hard to be someone who is without faults. I won't pretend to be this perfect person that has no judgement because I have plenty. I won't pretend that I will change into this person who doesn't gossip because that's just not me, I think we all need it every once in a while. I also won't pretend I like everyone because I surely don't. What I can say is that since I've had the boys my take on what's important has changed quite a bit. I used to believe that everyone had to like me. I used to believe that everyone talked about me every time I left a room. I used to believe I had no real friends. I used to be so highly sensitive to the people around me that I would have panic attacks if I didn't feel like I was liked. I care much less now. I now have my family. My children have become the reason I live and not the people around me. Sure I still care if my friends like me, that'll never change. I just choose to not focus on the petty things anymore. My family is my focus; they are who matter and who will always be in my life. I've taken a step back to observe who treats me the way I deserve to be treated and I've started paying attention to those things that just matter less. I've started liking myself more and wondering if I'm good enough less. I have friends who deeply care about me and those are all I need. I have an amazing family who will be there when my friends aren't and that is what I need to remember. I've been trying to just be kind to the people around me and although sometimes I slip (as per my first paragraph), I think I'm doing quite well. I use to repeat Ellen's exit words to my students every day : "Just be kind to one another" and honestly, I need to repeat to myself quite often and I will try to instill it in my children. I hope I succeed. Of course, a little humour never killed anyone as long as you don't directly hurt anyone in the process.

This was my last week at work and it felt good to say goodbye to another year. I start work again tomorrow and I'm actually super nervous but really excited at the same time. I will be teaching post intensive French to a group of kids who have decided to go to French Camp. I'm going to love those kids!! When I used to teach French at school, 75% of my students thought French was useless and stupid so it'll be a nice change to teach French to a class where 90% hopefully see the beauty in learning another language! I say 90% because I'm pretty sure 10% are there by the grace of the force of their parents haha!

We had a really great long weekend with the boys! They let us sleep in until 6h30 two mornings in a row and that was a welcome change! Seeing a 6 on the alarm instead of a 5 was awesome! We had a great Canada Day that started with fun at the park and in the splash pad in Dieppe then an afternoon/early evening spent at Léa and Tom's beachfront house where the boys played on the beach for about 2 hours. On Saturday morning we spent in Shédiac at my mother's and played in our Muddy Buddies due to the rain and the boys went to the mall for the afternoon with my in laws while Gab and I did the groceries. Today we started the morning with a bike ride in Mapleton Park (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hqBoU3bmUGw) followed by a play date with Kelly P and her boys and an inside play afternoon while Papa went to a mud bog with a friend.

We started the initial process of learning how to play hide and go seek. I would count to ten and then go find them but of course they were never hidden. They were just too excited for me to find them. They really loved the game though!

Bed time hasn't really changed. We're just going through the motions and accepting little by little that this is going to be what it's going to be for now. It's just another phase but we are consistent in what we ask so we know that eventually they will know the routine. It's always hard because we have lost 1.5 hours of "us" time but it is what it is and we just have to adjust to a new normal.